The Waiting Game

“Courage is looking fear straight in the face and saying, ‘Get the hell out of my way! I’ve got things to do!'”


Tomorrow is game day! And by tomorrow I mean today, since it’s now past 1 AM. This has been quite the week- filled with crafts, Breaking Bad, some awkward social drama, and a lot of anxiety provoking down time. This week was emotionally strenuous and mentally exhausting. These highly
skilled surgeons will be extracting my thyroid and changing my life forever.It’s kind of a lot to think about, and it made the entire week crawl by- but here I am! T minus 9 hours and counting. The suer is scheduled for 10:30, so we need to be there around 8:30 to prep. That means we have to leave here around… 6AM. Yay for Boston traffic!

What I thought would be the most anxious-filled night of my life (okay.. maybe not the worst– but still pretty anxiety provoking!), has turned out to be one of the nicest nights I’ve had in a long time. It’s really great when you find those not-so-average people to be part of your support team who will talk to you until 1:30 in the morning. I really appreciate the reminder that I’m not going through this alone.

Telling people has become almost a challenge. Its not necessarily what to say, its who I decided to tell. A family friend of ours brought up a good point- when you tell people before something starts, you’re telling them you need them. The more I think about it, the harder it is to decide who I really want by my side. Some people I have chosen to tell once the ball is rolling, but others simply found out due to timing. All I know for sure is that I’m beginning to realize the kinds of people I want and need- people who can be called upon for strength and are able to deliver without so much as a word.

I guess I should probably get some rest. I had a very calming 3.5 hour face time with someone who had continued to surprise me everyday since we met. I know that whatever happens, I’d really like him to be right there with me and the rest of my team.



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